Submitted on
I’ve gained weight recently. In overweight/obese America, that’s certainly not unusual, and the circumstance can provoke reactions ranging from klaxons and self-hatred to cluelessness and denial.
For today, I don’t have any of those, and I’m delighted. Even though I weigh myself only a handful of times of year, almost exclusively in doctors’ offices, I became aware that my bod was burgeoning by the feel of my clothing. So that’s how I avoided cluelessness.
I avoided the self-hatred because even though I’ve put on some weight — I’m guessing between 5 and 10 pounds — I haven’t been overeating. I follow my food plan with a wholesome rigor that recognizes its high importance in my life without slavish adherence. I know fellow food addicts who are both much stricter and somewhat looser; I know that my level has been working for me by my years in a healthy, narrow weight range.
So if I follow my food plan so well, how did I gain the weight? That is, of course, the key question, and the answer is, the plan changed. Early in the summer, I consulted with Theresa Wright, founder and operator of Renaissance Nutrition of East Norriton, Pa., who’s been my nutritionist for better than a decade. I believe she understands food addiction better than any non-food addict I’ve ever met, and I have complete trust in her.
I called because I was noticing more hunger and less energy than usual. When she asked, I told her I’d been exercising pretty regularly, running in the gym throughout the winter and then switching to cycling when it got warm. I already had a plan in which I ate 6 times a day, and she added food to most of those times. Most notably was that she added more grain and two ounces of protein to my breakfast.
The additions seemed like a lot to me, but I am well past the point of arguing with Theresa. That doesn’t mean I don’t object if she’s assigned something I don’t like the taste of, or a practice that’s inconvenient, but once the quotidian bits are settled, I just follow. That’s what more than a decade of health and other good results brings out, at least in me.
I did fine with it until perhaps three weeks ago, when, because of weather and other changes, my cycling fell from 50 miles a week to almost nothing. That sort of thing has happened at almost every seasonal change since I became an exerciser. Some years, I’d never make the transition back indoors, and in the others it has taken weeks or months. I didn’t know that I’d all but stopped — it was a reaction to the world outside, not a decision I made.
About a week ago, I started feeling my T-shirts on my tummy. It took me a couple of days to register that it wasn’t just that something had shrunk in the wash, and another couple to get past my reaction of shame from weight gain, a vestige of my fat decades as tangible as my remaining loose skin.
Then I talked to a close friend to whom I turn in matters such as these. For different reasons, I follow her about as willingly as I do Theresa. I told her what was happening, why I thought it was happening, and asked if she thought I could just return to the previous plan, at least to see what happens. In this case, I think I know the cause, but it could be my age, or an ingredient change I’m unaware of (like, if they started manufacturing my oatmeal with fat and added sugar, maybe), or some other factor. The most important thing here is that I do not make decisions about how I eat without consultation, because when I was running the show alone, I got up to 365.
So I’m back on the old plan, and though I sure didn’t mind eating more, I don’t really mind eating less, either. That reaction is no longer surprising because I’ve been in similar situations before, but there was a time when I would have been shocked; I was certain I needed every morsel, and would mourn the loss.
I’ll continue to try to make the exercise transition, and see how my body reacts, not only at the waistline, but in mood, energy, and hunger. In the meantime, unlike when I was operating solo, I don't fear that I’m doomed to return to the big 3-0-0 and I know I don’t have to beat myself up. If you’re a dieter of uneven results — and most dieters are — tell me how that compares with your experience.
- Michael's blog
- Log in to post comments